Tuesday, July 14, 2009
To add or not to add?
In my family, I am one of two girls. Growing up, my sister and I constantly fought. I hated how she imitated everything I did. She has the typical second born personality. She was compliant and could entertain herself. I, on the other hand, was very demanding and had to be entertained. When my dad remarried, his wife had two boys the same age as my sister and I. I loved it! They were my new playmates. Being "boys," they never ran out of things to do. They were adventurous and brave! Naturally, I always assumed I would have at least four - the way I grew up. By the time I got married (before kids), I boldly proclaimed I'd have six wonderful, well-behaved children! With each child, my proclamation decreases. Before Isaiah, I was back down to four. After Isaiah (my third), I'm wondering if I'm done. But it never fails. Just when I'm about to give up, I meet a fellow mom who has more children than me and urges me on for more. So the question remains: Should we add another personality to the mix? Or keep my life somewhat maintainable? I know for sure if I can imagine myself at 60 years old, I will wish I hadn't chickened out.
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I agree strongly Ashley. I mean, I def. don't want that many kids but I think my wife will and the more I think about the big family stuff we can do later on in life, the more I am being pursuaded. Plus, you have to keep trying for a girl ya know. Give those boys somebody to protect in a few years. ha. I think it'll be tuff, but if anybody can do it, yall can.
ReplyDeleteps. if not yall should adopt some african baby like Brandjolina
Sincerly
Me
Actually Kwon, we have considered adoption. I think we'd be looking in the Asian part of the world because so many people have told me that I look like I have some Asian in me. That way SOMEBODY will look like me!
ReplyDeleteHaha the above wasn't me actually :-P I think adoption is wonderful, but you must be mindful that adoption has its own share of difficulties. A lot of adopted kids grow up very rebellious and have coping/attachment disorders. My older brother was very rebellious growing up and my cousin also. Not all kids suffer from it, from what I've read and heard a lot has to do with how the foster parents overseas nurture the babies in the first few months. I didn't have any rebellious spells too out of the ordinary growing up. But the adoption process can also be vexing since you're completely victim to any delays the agency sets. My adoption was postponed 2-3 times before they actually sent me which was devastating to my mom each time they had cancelled the transfer. Not to make it sound scary or anything, but just some thoughts a lot of people don't consider beforehand. -Kwon
ReplyDeleteSorry about that Kwon! Thanks for the input from your perspective!
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